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It’s probably one of the most frequent questions to cross every Momma’s mind: Is it okay to read my daughter’s diary? I asked some moms and dads what they thought about taking a sneak peek into their daughter’s diary. Is it okay, or not? Here are some of the replies I received:

“The only time I would find this acceptable is if there were a drastic change in her behavior that resulted in a negative manner. The odd behavior could point to drug abuse, pregnancy, abuse, etc.” - Kari, US

“Because it’s private, full stop. You shouldn’t need to peek into her diary to read her thoughts, even if she is acting weird.” - Tashfeed, Vancouver, BC

“Generally, no, but if talking fails and you are looking for info about behavioral change, maybe.” - Sharon Hurley Hall

“No, except in the direst circumstances. I have 3 grown daughters.” - Sue, London

“Only if you don’t want your daughter to trust you.” - Sharonda, US

I have mixed feeling about the diary-reading debate. As a young woman without children, I always said I would never stoop to snooping on my children. However, now that I am a mother, I can understand those who say it is okay to read your daughter’s diary when you have good reason for concern.

My greatest issue with this is that my mother snooped on me as a child, then used it against me. So I can understand how a child feels when they pour their heart out on paper, then have that secret violated by a snooping parent.

To Read, Or Not To Read

If you do not think it is right to read your daughter’s diary, even if you have sound cause to be worried about an underlying problem, you should go with your first instinct. If you are on the opposite end of the spectrum and think that there is no level of snooping too low when it comes to looking after the safety and well-being of your child, then so be it for you. As a mother, you know your child best, regardless of which side of the fence you sit.

Are you a peeking Momma?

What do you think? Do you think it’s okay to ready your daughter’s diary? Have you ever read her diary? If so, did you feel bad about it afterwards? Would you do it again?